The Fall Of A Giant

For some people, it was Suez. For others, the Profumo affair. Yet for a third group, those hacks who cover the Liberal Democrats, the end of an era is here.

If, as expected, leader Charles Kennedy gets tossed out later on this month, no longer will they be able to write stories about his reported "battles with the bottle." No longer will they be able to smirk and giggle and make knowing references to him being "tired and emotional" at party conferences. And no longer will we see the traditional Springtime "Kennedy swears he's a changed man" story (complete with picture of oddly worried family).

So than, in commiseration with this intrepid little band of journalists, let us bow our heads. And pause. And maybe even say a little prayer. Alas. We shall not see his like again.

FREE FOOD!

Seriously, if you're going to send out a press release for an event no one cares about ("UNICEF Announces A New Pollen-Allergy Offensive!"), that's all you need to put at the top. Even if it's a blatant lie, you'll still get enough responses to look good in front of your bosses.

Otherwise, what you get is a bunch of media bottom-feeders sneering at you ("Hey, buddy, don't waste my time!") and then flouncing off to write a bitchy entry on their blogs.

On the other hand...

Just because someone hasn't put out a press release or aren't listed in a media guide, doesn't mean they don't want to talk to reporters. In fact, if at one time they've let their phone number be put out ANYWHERE on the net, that means that they'd just LOVE to talk to you and spend hours answering your braindead questions. No, really, take my word on it. Any hour of the day or night, especially when you need that all-important second source, they'll be waiting right by the phone, a huge smile on their face.

And if their number is unlisted? It just means they're shy and need to be brought out of their shell. Nag their friends and neighbors until they cough it up.