The Future Is Here

Who says there's never any good news in the papers? According to recent reports, soon we'll be able to legally play poker in pubs. At the same time, the Tories are thinking about bringing in the 35-hour work week, just like in France. Plus, they've trained sniffer bees to detect suicide bombers in the Underground.

Yes, comrades, soon we'll be blowing away our paychecks playing poker all hours of the day down at the pub, content in the knowledge that those wondrous insects have gotten that terrorism problem licked. And heck, even that pesky global warming won't be so bad after all.